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It's a Bird. It's a Plane. It's Really, Really Bad. But it had Potential. - Supergirl (1984)

Some claim that Superman’s icon crest is more recognizable than the Christian cross. And regardless of whether or not that’s true, it’s far from a baseless notion. For this day and age, it’s the superhero that acts as the modern-day myth, cult, church, role model, everything. And among the plethora of tight wearing titans, the O.G. Man of Steel remains supreme as the gold standard of hope, heroics, and hearth-side tales. So then where does that leave his, some may argue, lesser counterpart, Supergirl? Is Kara Zor-El just a one-’n-done gender swap gimmick meant to milk out a few more greenbacks from the Superman brand? Or is she a worthy carrier of the fabled crest, one that steps out from Superman’s mile high shadow to bask in her own glorious light? Well, if one were to base their decision off of her first theatrical foray, it’s hard to believe anyone would find her compelling in the slightest. But maybe, just maybe that has to do more with the offered story, rather than the heroin, herself. Let’s get into it. 


1984’s flophouse classic, Supergirl, was written by David Odell, directed by Jeannot Szwarc, and stars Helen Slater as Kara Zor-El (aka Supergirl). And despite riding the coattails of the beloved (although far from perfect) Superman Cinema franchise, it just couldn’t buy enough good faith to justify this wildly absurd spectacle. And to be clear, there are some movies that are so bad, they’re good. But this, at least for me, does not possess that sort of endearing shine. It certainly possessed a chance had it offered even the slightest bit of coherence. But between hollow characters making nonsensical choices, aimless plot beats, and a love story with the romantic allure of a pile of stale, lumpy mash potatoes, Supergirl is hardly worth a watch, even for what little good (both sincerely and ironically) that is there. BUT …  this is nothing new for those that even care to remember Supergirl. So rather than merely punch down at it, I’d also like to speak a bit more to its merits and potential, before completely banishing it into the Phantom Zone of my mind.


For all its blunders, Supergirl does offer genuine glimmers of promise and movie magic throughout its duration. Starting first with its breathtaking opening scene at the city of Kandor, it immediately instills one with the wonder and majesty that only a practical set can. Call me old fashion, but to be graced with a hand crafted, fantasy setting, rather than blasted with yet another CGI illusionary landscape, feels utterly refreshing for a silver screen experience in today’s day and age.


Second, any instance where Supergirl flies is nothing short of pure cinematic bliss. It surely isn’t anything flashy by today’s standards, but that’s the magic. It really marinates in its awe-inspiring simplicity, offering an captivating orchestral swell beneath a heavenly glide across a plethora of sweeping landscapes. There’s just something about its craft that feels wondrous, timeless, and intoxicating, so much to the point one would really believe a girl can fly. 


Next, I must applaud the ingenious utilization of the plot device that is Supergirl’s bracelet. In the film it’s used for mostly two purposes, acting as a tracker for the movie’s main magguffin she needs to find and as an instant costume changer whenever she needs to switch in and out of her Super Suit. Now this sort of a catch all get-out-of-jail-for-free card could be chalked up as lazy convenience, but seeing how it’s used sparingly to expedite the story and to offer some quick, fun on screen costume changes, I find it more of an cleverly cooked up asset, rather than a detriment to the film. In fact, had other more important aspects of the film shined better (story, plot, etc.), I believe most would have found the bracelet to be a fun and welcomed addition to the film.


Lastly, we must mention the bold choice of pitting Supergirl against magical villains. Because on face value, to general audiences, this may seem like a head scratcher. That fact of the matter is that many probably consider Superman as more of a sci-fi-esque superhero, especially since he’s usually interacting or fighting against entities of a more technological, militaristic, or alien nature (at least in the movies). However, comic book lore does establish that he has a weakness to magic or at least has a difficult time dealing with it. So, to give Supergirl magical villains not only distinguishes her adventure away from Superman’s films, it also sets a precedent that she maybe can handle a situation that the Big Boy in Blue may not be as equipped for or at least has never been challenged with. To me, this gives the film a little more subtle girl power without it being too on-the-nose. Add to it that when the magic does show up, it (for the briefest of moments) allows the film to express this trippy, psychedelic energy with a splash of fantasy that other Superman films simply DO NOT possess. Now true enough, in practice, it mostly doesn’t work. But in concept, it’s highly interesting and shows promise. And if one needs absolute proof that it could work, I suggest looking at the Shazam franchise, which many could argue is just Fantasy Superman.


So, considering all of those wonderful elements, was Supergirl just a lazily cobbled together, gender swap cash-grab? Well, it’s hard to deny that assertion with the lackluster film we ultimately got. But although it’s hard to see, I believe this particular story of Kara Zor-El has a lot to offer the silver screen (in concept). The reality is that we already know the character itself works. We need look no further than the successful Supergirl CW tv show or even the characters brief, but enthralling inclusion in 2023’s Flash to know that. So really, it’s the story itself and not so much the surrounding elements (mostly) that need work. Because truly, I believe nearly every idea in here could land with more competent writing and clever direction. The elements are there. Maybe not to make a timeless masterpiece, but definitely something that could dazzle, entertain, and offer hope for this 80’s rendition of The Last Daughter of Krypton. But I guess we’ll never know. For now, Supergirl and this film will remain banished to the Phantom Zone for the betterment of humanity. And rightfully so. But maybe if we’re lucky, Supergirl and Supergirl alone will at some point shake off this blunder and fight her way out to try and save her beloved Kandor one more time. But hey, one can only hope.



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