Low Budget Movie Buff: Movie Reviews

WARNING: There will be light spoilers sprinkled throughout the beginning of this review as well as possible heavy spoilers towards the end. If you do not care, then read on. However, if you’re jonesing for some pure, unspoiled, cinematic magic, I highly suggest watching the movie first. “Happily ever after …” Probably the most common phrase ever put to paper, one that rounds out nearly every grand tale worth telling. It’s what you say after the noble prince slays the dragon and saves the princess, when the underdog heroes finally best the Big Bad and return home, or when a dedicated parent risks it all, moving heaven and earth, to finally reunite with their long lost child. But as nice a bow as “happily ever after” is atop any story, very rarely does this actually signify the true end, nor does it acknowledge the messiness that comes in the aftermath of surviving such stressful ordeals. But what if a story did? What if within its very narrative, it put on in full display the struggl...

It's a tale as old as time. Earth falls under threat of an otherworldly force, prompting humanity to cobble together a ragtag team of would-be heroes to save it from sheer enslavement and/or annihilation (take your pick). However, what separates Mortal Kombat from the seemingly endless catalog of similar stories are the unique kung-fu tournament-focused specifics of it's world ending scenario, it's crimson-stained hyper violence, a colorful cast of karacters , and of course a deep and rich bastion of fan-beloved lore. It's just such a shame that with all these wonderful toys and avenues for creativity, the MK creators just can't seem to fully step away from the original glorious outing of their universe, much less its staple karacters. But perhaps, with enough care and ingenuity, they can make the past feel as fresh and fun as their first blood spattered debut ... maybe. Let's get into it. Mortal Kombat is a story in which the champions of Outworld and Earthreal...

The lights fall low and the dream-like silver screen dazzles the eyes with the humble beginnings of an all too familiar tale. The sprawling forests of an seemingly nondescript fantasy world bleed into view, before homing in on a party of unlikely heroes; heroes that have been brought together by the whispers of apocalyptic destruction. And although some are more eager than others to commit to such a heroic quest, they all go (more or less) willingly, finding adventure, hardship, and revelation along the way. The Cursed Dreams of Giants: Belly of the Bone Whale is yet another would-be fantasy-franchise-starter that endeavors to stand out in an oversaturated genre already packed with juggernauts like Willow, The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance, Dungeons & Dragons, of course the many fantastic adaptations of The Lord of the Rings . But are such aspirations merely the crazed fallacies of a starry-eyed filmmaker or has director Julia McLaughlin crafted the next great epic to be etched...

Nostalgia. It's a hell of a drug. One so powerful and moving that it can throw the mind back in time, sooth away everyday woes, and even turn the coldest of hearts into bright, beaming shine-sprites. However, for as much as it delivers on that sweet, sought-after euphoria we all know and love, it can also leave us blind to obvious (sometimes even problematic) truths we’re too doped up to notice. So one has to wonder, when the jumpman titan of the Nintendo dynasty yipped and yahooed across the silver screen, did he merely indulge us with low hanging member-berries or had he finally delivered us a long awaited videogame, cinematic masterpiece? Let’s get into it. While fixing pipes in the Brooklyn underground, sibling plumbers Mario (Chris Pratt) and Luigi (Charlie Day) are transported through a mysterious pipe to a magical new world. Once there, they become separated, leaving Mario to team up with Princess Peach (Anya Taylor-Joy) to find his brother and save him from the clutches of ...

Movies like Genie are far too bland to bless with  heavy handed words or any sort of analysis beyond its surface value. For if one were to even attempt such a feat, they would find nothing. In layman's terms, "what you see is what you get." And what is there is fairly expected, safe, and simply "fine," which are both the kindest and worst things I can say about it. But if you insist on knowing more, I can certainly try. Genie follows down on his luck, mildly work-o-holic/push-over dad, Bernard (Paapa Essiedu), who commits the try-and-true Christmas cinema sin of choosing work over family. So after missing his daughter's birthday and forgetting her gift back at his office, his wife, Julie (Denée Benton), feels it's best if they separate for a time. But luckily for him, he stumbles upon a jewelry box containing a magical genie named Flora (Melissa McCartney), who's determined to help Bernard win back his family.  I'll give you the broad strokes. Be...

Hey there moviegoer! Are you looking for a quick, surefire scream-fest to round off or perhaps even ELONGATE your spooky season?! Some straightforward scares that waste no time getting to the deadly point? Then look no further than 2023's Cobweb out on Hulu, Prime, and YouTube today! You got kills! You got screams! You got mysterious knocks coming from inside a creepy house that prompt an awkward, lonely child to distrust some potentially murderous parents! But are they?! Maybe! You don't know! But you could find out! And by the time you do ... Well the movie just might be over before you know it. Dare I say, perhaps a tad too early.  (WARNING: Mild spoilers for the end, but nothing specific beyond its length ... Oh! And also Diehard.) So to back up just a smidge, Cobweb (Directed by Samuel Boding and written by Chris Delvin) is a horror-thriller following a small, 8 yr-old boy named Peter as he investigates the mysterious knocks coming from inside his bedroom wall. In time,...

Ever since the fabled John Wick graced the silver screen with its specific brand of revenge-seeking, blood-opera gun-fu back in 2014, the world has experienced a major uptick of imitation in its wake. The likes of Atomic Blonde, Maria, Polar, Equalizer, and an ocean of others have and continue to flood movie theaters and streaming platforms alike. And as with any crowded market, there too came the inevitable challenge of standing out, let alone receiving any sort of meaningful accolades. So then what is one to make of Netflix's two fairly recent and somewhat peculiar attempts: Gunpowder Milkshake and Kate ? While both certainly bring their own unique spin to the genre, do they have what it takes to stand out in a blood spattered crowd? Let's get into it. Kate (2021) is a dark, gritty tale of an orphan girl turned assassin named Kate (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) that gets fatally poisoned on the job. So now with only 24 hours to live, she sets her sights on finding out who order...